You should seriously read this, hilariously outrageous... The Guy's Guide To Rules of Engagement: Chapter 2 - Species in the Kingdom of Eve (Part A: Office Chicks).
Haven't we met one of each kind along the way? Whilst I was reading it, laughing aloud flashes of certain people came to mind. God, I miss those days!!!
20090227
sos called
the buzzing in the ear....well the sos calling earlier (not exact conversation but somewhat lah). nanti tak pasal-pasal ada orang comment kata eh tak betul lah, editlah...well we were talking about other things (ie our ke-terrer-an in our national language), then we came to the earlier sms she sent me...
me: so what do you need babe?
bb: moolah lah. i'm going to xx this evening with some of them for two nites
me: berapa
bb: rm300 cukup kot
me: hotel semua dah book & paid for
bb: dah, i need $$ for makan dorang jer
me: (didn't know how many in the group) you nak bagi makan roti canai hari-hari ke?
bb: alah, kat xx bukannye mahal sangat pun. kalau makan seafood berapa?
me: entah, i haven't been there in ages. u tak sempat ke balik ambik yr purse
bb: tak boleh lah, busy ni
me: then you gonna go without your license & ic?
bb: ya, i tak drive
me: you ah. nanti kena tahan mistaken for myanmar refugee camner?
bb: you better leave your mobile on lah. nanti i bagi u mak i punyer number also...
angelita, how lah your friend??
me: so what do you need babe?
bb: moolah lah. i'm going to xx this evening with some of them for two nites
me: berapa
bb: rm300 cukup kot
me: hotel semua dah book & paid for
bb: dah, i need $$ for makan dorang jer
me: (didn't know how many in the group) you nak bagi makan roti canai hari-hari ke?
bb: alah, kat xx bukannye mahal sangat pun. kalau makan seafood berapa?
me: entah, i haven't been there in ages. u tak sempat ke balik ambik yr purse
bb: tak boleh lah, busy ni
me: then you gonna go without your license & ic?
bb: ya, i tak drive
me: you ah. nanti kena tahan mistaken for myanmar refugee camner?
bb: you better leave your mobile on lah. nanti i bagi u mak i punyer number also...
angelita, how lah your friend??
sos calling
ting ting *incoming SMS*
Babe, u ard 2day? Nd help..silly me!
*type type type*
Can't test the condom hubby takde
*presses send button*
ting ting *incoming SMS*
Haha..no la. I left me purse at home.now hving mting wt some ppl n jus realised i dont hv money 2 pay their coffee!! Lol! Dat sorted xcept im leavin town later wt these ppl n i dun hv my purse! Cal u in a bit
And I am still waiting for my phone to buzz...
to pedigree or not to pedigree
As my favourite time of the year approaches, I am sitting & compiling the documents (income statement, receipts, etc etc etc). Then I look through my insurance documents & start poring over the benefits and what it covers.
So I was looking at my home insurance plan & realise that I am not adequately protected and need to make the changes on the next renewal. So I call my agent & we start yakking on the phone. And I learn that I need to extend the cover to Worldwide Personal Effects & Valuable (ie coverage outside of the home) & am pondering on Worldwide Personal Liability (if one of you visit me & my cat bites you and you decide to sue me for insufferable pain knowing how drama some of my friends can be).
So anyways, my agent tells me 'Eh, your pedigree also can cover you know in case of accidental death.'
Me: Pedigree, meaning they need a cert right?
Him: Ya
Me: Alamak, like that ah. Mine got no cert but behave like a pedigree
Him: Yalah, lifestyle of the rich & famous mah
Me: Ya, ya my cat not us.
See I have this cat who is like in his sunset age already & he is the bratiest of the brats. Behaves like royalty but in actual fact is a mix of Persian (me thinks) & some horny kucing kampung. Eats only special diet which is only available at vets that cost a bomb (and he's like eating every other hour); use special litter 'cos we live in an apartment & don't want the whole place to stink which also costs a bomb; insists on sleeping with some part of his fat body on our carpet although he has his own blankie & must have company when he's eating.
Make no mistake, I am not exactly a cat person (I don't like them brushing against my leg - gelilah) but this one I am attached to. When he's away for boarding ke, we kind of miss having something to irritate or just to call out. So certificate or no, he's still our royal pain in the butt....
So I was looking at my home insurance plan & realise that I am not adequately protected and need to make the changes on the next renewal. So I call my agent & we start yakking on the phone. And I learn that I need to extend the cover to Worldwide Personal Effects & Valuable (ie coverage outside of the home) & am pondering on Worldwide Personal Liability (if one of you visit me & my cat bites you and you decide to sue me for insufferable pain knowing how drama some of my friends can be).
So anyways, my agent tells me 'Eh, your pedigree also can cover you know in case of accidental death.'
Me: Pedigree, meaning they need a cert right?
Him: Ya
Me: Alamak, like that ah. Mine got no cert but behave like a pedigree
Him: Yalah, lifestyle of the rich & famous mah
Me: Ya, ya my cat not us.
See I have this cat who is like in his sunset age already & he is the bratiest of the brats. Behaves like royalty but in actual fact is a mix of Persian (me thinks) & some horny kucing kampung. Eats only special diet which is only available at vets that cost a bomb (and he's like eating every other hour); use special litter 'cos we live in an apartment & don't want the whole place to stink which also costs a bomb; insists on sleeping with some part of his fat body on our carpet although he has his own blankie & must have company when he's eating.Make no mistake, I am not exactly a cat person (I don't like them brushing against my leg - gelilah) but this one I am attached to. When he's away for boarding ke, we kind of miss having something to irritate or just to call out. So certificate or no, he's still our royal pain in the butt....
20090224
heil grammatik!!
ever heard of the term 'grammar nazi'? never heard of it? let me enlighten you...
grammar nazi - noun (pl, -s): (a) a person who believes proper grammar (and spelling) should be used by everyone whenever possible. (b) one who attempts to persuade or force others to use proper grammar and spelling. (c) one who uses proper grammar and spelling to subtly mock or deride those who do not; an exhibitor of grammatical superiority. (d) one who advocates linguistic clarity. (e) one who corrects others' grammar; the spelling police. (source: http://www.urbandictionary.com/)
yes, yours truly does have the tendency to be a grammar nazi & i fall into category (e). it can be a very annoying habit especially to the receiving end but really, we cannot help it. well at least i can't. and the daughter has taken on this habit as well. the hubby gets pretty peeved when i correct him but i guess after seventeen years, he's gotten used to that. and i guess my friends too.
and... i tend to have a habit of correcting & telling off my nephews and nieces especially to chew quietly, close their mouth while chewing their food, not talking with their mouth full, and the whole nine yards...tu nazi apa pulak?
maybe from now on, i should get all my punctuations right too.. yes yes, my grammer is gooder & powderful.
20090223
obsession confession
we were across the causeway for the weekend. managed to behave myself, kept my insatiable desire for bags to myself although i saw a couple to die for in the chanel store. must have been reciting the 'just say no' mantra to myself plus the fact that after conversion, the said item of desire would set me back a cool rm10k. never mind, i'll just wait for the next sale or for it to turn up at the used bags store... walk on by now. hubby bought himself some stuff for an upcoming trip some time this week. okay, happy happy.
saw a gorgeous lime green bejewelled sandals at the jimmy choo outlet. a bit exorbitant i told myself especially for footwear. my jaw almost fell to the ground when they told me the price. hubby said kalau beli, display la. i told him i'll wait till we get a display cabinet lah. yes, yes i was able to resist this as well. so in the end, i settled with an ax dress. okay, no matter...
so last day & we were bound home. gst refund, check. check in luggage, boarding pass, check. breakfast in the tummy, check. so okay, we masuk lah boarding gate. went through immigration - smile, smile, stamp, stamp, say thank yous, go through detector no beep, walk walk walk. walk lah, walk lah...hubby diverted into boss outlet & i thought i'll take a peep into ferragamo..
hmm, nice nice nice. try try try...no no too 'bow'y, no no too aunty, no no too shiny. and then! and then! the stupid salesperson showed me the black rosalba. argh!! all defenses gone.....ponder ponder, sling sling, try try...nice leh? nice huh? nice or not?
nice lah nice lah...will it be cheaper back here? the guy who sold it to me assures me its definitely cheaper there (no tax mah!!) & if i do find it cheaper here, i can go back for a refund. so next stop - pavilion (the ferragamo boutique is there kan kan kan?).
saw a gorgeous lime green bejewelled sandals at the jimmy choo outlet. a bit exorbitant i told myself especially for footwear. my jaw almost fell to the ground when they told me the price. hubby said kalau beli, display la. i told him i'll wait till we get a display cabinet lah. yes, yes i was able to resist this as well. so in the end, i settled with an ax dress. okay, no matter...
so last day & we were bound home. gst refund, check. check in luggage, boarding pass, check. breakfast in the tummy, check. so okay, we masuk lah boarding gate. went through immigration - smile, smile, stamp, stamp, say thank yous, go through detector no beep, walk walk walk. walk lah, walk lah...hubby diverted into boss outlet & i thought i'll take a peep into ferragamo..
hmm, nice nice nice. try try try...no no too 'bow'y, no no too aunty, no no too shiny. and then! and then! the stupid salesperson showed me the black rosalba. argh!! all defenses gone.....ponder ponder, sling sling, try try...nice leh? nice huh? nice or not?
nice lah nice lah...will it be cheaper back here? the guy who sold it to me assures me its definitely cheaper there (no tax mah!!) & if i do find it cheaper here, i can go back for a refund. so next stop - pavilion (the ferragamo boutique is there kan kan kan?).
amo il mio rosalba di ferragamo
20090222
can i take your order
there is a new restaurant in 1utama called gardens lifestyle & store (go here if you want to look at some pix). let's see if i can describe it - ala al-fresco dining ie. the garden ambience but with fake plants & flowers, but it's not. if i am not mistaken there are boutiques there as well but haven't checked that out yet.
so tonight the hubby & i thought we would give this eatery a try. the girl greeting us at the entrance was okay albeit a bit chatty. she brought us to our place, gave us the menu & told us what their specials were. okay, so far so good.
the waiter came by to take our orders - we settled for black pepper chicken chop for the hubby & pasta pormodoro for moi and a side of fresh oysters as appetizers (no, no. not what you think). so anyways, my pasta - no cheese.
a short while later, my pasta arrived but with cheese. so i told the waiter politely that i requested without cheese. he took it away & said he will check. the hubby was asking why i was so fussy. i told him when i ordered i did specifically say 'no cheese'. if i forgot to mention it earlier, i wouldn't kick up a fuss. so okay.. a while after hubby order came. no foul-ups there. then my pasta came again sans cheese.
the food was kinda good actually, serving just nice. then just when we thought they forgot the oysters, it came. so the hubby asked the girl (who incidentally was the one who greeted & ushered us) how come this dish is late, its normally appetizers. she said 'it does take a while if it's baked'. both of us went simultaneously 'baked?'.
hubby thought we read the menu wrongly but i insisted on checking the menu. after confirming that we did actually see the word 'fresh'; we told the supervisor that we actually ordered fresh oysters. but the hubby felt kinda bad & said that we would just take the baked oysters which i wasn't a fan of.
the supervisor must have felt bad, so he came to offer us dessert but we declined politely. as we called for the bill, they apologised again for the screw-ups & offered us a 10% discount. then the manager (me thinks) came by & apologised again. they wanted us to fill up a comment form but we thought we'd take a pass considering what they put us through.
just as we were getting out of the place, the first waitress who greeted us stopped us again to apologize & said that the next time we dine there, she would personally take our orders. they must taken a digital photo of us secretly, pasted it somewhere with a note - do not let foreigners take their order or ban them from dining here.
i am not saying i would try out that place again, i will give them the benefit of the doubt. after all they are only a month old. but the next time they screw, i will ban them myself.
so tonight the hubby & i thought we would give this eatery a try. the girl greeting us at the entrance was okay albeit a bit chatty. she brought us to our place, gave us the menu & told us what their specials were. okay, so far so good.
the waiter came by to take our orders - we settled for black pepper chicken chop for the hubby & pasta pormodoro for moi and a side of fresh oysters as appetizers (no, no. not what you think). so anyways, my pasta - no cheese.
a short while later, my pasta arrived but with cheese. so i told the waiter politely that i requested without cheese. he took it away & said he will check. the hubby was asking why i was so fussy. i told him when i ordered i did specifically say 'no cheese'. if i forgot to mention it earlier, i wouldn't kick up a fuss. so okay.. a while after hubby order came. no foul-ups there. then my pasta came again sans cheese.
the food was kinda good actually, serving just nice. then just when we thought they forgot the oysters, it came. so the hubby asked the girl (who incidentally was the one who greeted & ushered us) how come this dish is late, its normally appetizers. she said 'it does take a while if it's baked'. both of us went simultaneously 'baked?'.
hubby thought we read the menu wrongly but i insisted on checking the menu. after confirming that we did actually see the word 'fresh'; we told the supervisor that we actually ordered fresh oysters. but the hubby felt kinda bad & said that we would just take the baked oysters which i wasn't a fan of.
the supervisor must have felt bad, so he came to offer us dessert but we declined politely. as we called for the bill, they apologised again for the screw-ups & offered us a 10% discount. then the manager (me thinks) came by & apologised again. they wanted us to fill up a comment form but we thought we'd take a pass considering what they put us through.
just as we were getting out of the place, the first waitress who greeted us stopped us again to apologize & said that the next time we dine there, she would personally take our orders. they must taken a digital photo of us secretly, pasted it somewhere with a note - do not let foreigners take their order or ban them from dining here.
i am not saying i would try out that place again, i will give them the benefit of the doubt. after all they are only a month old. but the next time they screw, i will ban them myself.
20090219
curious cat
yesterday over lunch, cat was talking to her friend & i about a project she is undertaking. something to do with the condoms. then in a hush, she asks me 'do you know that there is such a thing called the female condom?'
uhhh, ya... she said she just found out. the friend is curious on how it should be worn or is it used? she said can it come out once it has been inserted. well i told 'i guess what goes in must come out'. cat asked 'kemut ah?' & i replied 'no, if kemut it will masuk lagi. kena teran lah' (i know someone who's gonna go gross, gross, gross in my comment section)
so i took the liberty of googling femidom to help cat with her curiosity.. i guess they were more curious on how to use it than anything else. so go here if you so want to know.
20090217
i try but they wouldn't let me
ever come across those pesky sales person or promoters - credit cards, promotional vouchers. they approach you with their wares in hand going 'hi miss, we are doing a promotion...' or something like that.
if i am interested in their wares, i would normally give them a chance to fill me in on the information. if i am not, i say very nicely 'no thank you' or 'i already have your product'. but when they become very persistent & walks with you whilst still trying to convince you to part with your moolah; it kind of gets on your nerves doesn't it? i don't know about you but it irritates the hell out of me. so patiently i tell them yet again 'no, really. thank you'. but do they go away? noooooo... they keep yapping away in a language only they can understand.
so what do i do? after three 'no thank you's; i simply ask them 'which part of no thank you don't you understand?'. suddenly they wish they would have just disappeared after the first rejection. i tried to be nice, really i did. very very hard but they just wouldn't let me.
now, go away!!
if i am interested in their wares, i would normally give them a chance to fill me in on the information. if i am not, i say very nicely 'no thank you' or 'i already have your product'. but when they become very persistent & walks with you whilst still trying to convince you to part with your moolah; it kind of gets on your nerves doesn't it? i don't know about you but it irritates the hell out of me. so patiently i tell them yet again 'no, really. thank you'. but do they go away? noooooo... they keep yapping away in a language only they can understand.
so what do i do? after three 'no thank you's; i simply ask them 'which part of no thank you don't you understand?'. suddenly they wish they would have just disappeared after the first rejection. i tried to be nice, really i did. very very hard but they just wouldn't let me.
now, go away!!
20090216
come to mama!!
i can feel it in my bones...it's coming. soon!! very soon!! i can feel it. i can touch it. i can smell it. soon my baby...we are destined to be together & we will... no other will do for me, but you...
the rest can kiss my mini ass!!
the rest can kiss my mini ass!!
a rose by any other name
while on the way to breakfast this morning, the hubby & i were listening to the radio. an ad came on where one guy calls the other guy bro. as some of you may know by now of the unintelligible conversations the hubby & i have sometimes. so this ensued...
me: bro, bro. i don't get it. why do men have to have each other as bro, dude? and i don't get when girls call each other dude. what's that about
him: okay what bro, dude
me: what's worse is men calling each other beb
him: why? what's wrong with that
me: its just so wrong. it's more suitable to call a girl babe/beb
him: its not mat saleh babe lah, its melayu beb
me: what is melayu beb?
him: orang johor panggil kawan beb. pahal beb, wa tak kisah beb (in that annoying tone)... beb tu cam member lah. you know, kawan?
me: then kenapa tak panggil mem/maam jer?
him: (laughs) funny lah you...
one thing's for sure, communication ain't dead in this marriage!!
me: bro, bro. i don't get it. why do men have to have each other as bro, dude? and i don't get when girls call each other dude. what's that about
him: okay what bro, dude
me: what's worse is men calling each other beb
him: why? what's wrong with that
me: its just so wrong. it's more suitable to call a girl babe/beb
him: its not mat saleh babe lah, its melayu beb
me: what is melayu beb?
him: orang johor panggil kawan beb. pahal beb, wa tak kisah beb (in that annoying tone)... beb tu cam member lah. you know, kawan?
me: then kenapa tak panggil mem/maam jer?
him: (laughs) funny lah you...
one thing's for sure, communication ain't dead in this marriage!!
20090215
birthday shout out....to the daughter
today she turns fifteen. the dad & i got her a gift which we are not sure really whether it was what she wanted. still...love, kisses & hugs to our darling daughter. guess who popped by to wish her happy birthday!!
20090213
escorting socially
sometime last week during the girls' nite out, cat 'recruited' me to be a social escort for an upcoming event she's organizing (more like sosial eskot). i asked her how come she's not using her client's employee to do that, she says got lah some syt but they don't have the persona. apparently i have the persona, whatever that is so she thought i might be suitable for the job. and i am getting paid. see, i told you there is a halo slowly forming above my head & i am glowing with wings in my back.....you don't want to believe. you got or not, this persona? don't have, kan kan kan..
anyways, last night cat reminded me about requiring my services. so i asked - time? dress code? the exchange of sms-es went somewhat (not exactly lah) like this:
cat: 830 office wear
me: office wear? what's that? i don't have any of those anymore (penganggur terhormat for about what two years now??)
cat: go buy one lah
me: no way. last i remembered i used to go to the office in jeans & polo tees
cat: cannot
me: okay lah i think i have a dress somewhere...
and today after being stood up by some diva, i suggested to the hubby for a nite out of music, chatter & drinks. he asked if my friends wanted to come along. casting aside all the domesticated ones who have a million & one reasons, i sent an sms to cat asking her if she wanted to join. caught her on gtalk like this:
me: oi
cat: oi
me: why you no reply my sms?
cat: wait, wait let me check. ahhh..can't la amoi..esok ada date..field trip early in the morning
me: ohkay lah
cat: siapa pegi
me: so far hubby & me only
cat: valentine eve..how lomantic
me: nolah, just going out for fun. obviously you haven't read my latest post
cat: bulum ;) bz buat legal agreement...can u beat that??
me: oooh, ally mcbeal with short skirt et al
cat: hehehe..ya..ya..xcept me in shorts hhaha
me: trend sekarang mah kira office wear la tu. ooh ooh can i wear that kat istana kuda mas?
cat: TAK LEH ;p (yes yes in capital letters)
me: alamak garangnye mak ayam ni
so saper-saper yang nak melanggan eskot servis yang so sial ni, sila lah berhubung ngan mamasan cat...
anyways, last night cat reminded me about requiring my services. so i asked - time? dress code? the exchange of sms-es went somewhat (not exactly lah) like this:
cat: 830 office wear
me: office wear? what's that? i don't have any of those anymore (penganggur terhormat for about what two years now??)
cat: go buy one lah
me: no way. last i remembered i used to go to the office in jeans & polo tees
cat: cannot
me: okay lah i think i have a dress somewhere...
and today after being stood up by some diva, i suggested to the hubby for a nite out of music, chatter & drinks. he asked if my friends wanted to come along. casting aside all the domesticated ones who have a million & one reasons, i sent an sms to cat asking her if she wanted to join. caught her on gtalk like this:
me: oi
cat: oi
me: why you no reply my sms?
cat: wait, wait let me check. ahhh..can't la amoi..esok ada date..field trip early in the morning
me: ohkay lah
cat: siapa pegi
me: so far hubby & me only
cat: valentine eve..how lomantic
me: nolah, just going out for fun. obviously you haven't read my latest post
cat: bulum ;) bz buat legal agreement...can u beat that??
me: oooh, ally mcbeal with short skirt et al
cat: hehehe..ya..ya..xcept me in shorts hhaha
me: trend sekarang mah kira office wear la tu. ooh ooh can i wear that kat istana kuda mas?
cat: TAK LEH ;p (yes yes in capital letters)
me: alamak garangnye mak ayam ni
so saper-saper yang nak melanggan eskot servis yang so sial ni, sila lah berhubung ngan mamasan cat...
lock me up & throw away the keys
is it a crime to be anti-valentine? it's not that i am anti in a sense that i am the valentine grinch but i just think it's a bit over-rated. in most cases, the guy is expected to buy roses, chocolates, arrange for candle light dinner, a movie and what-have-you & all at exorbitant prices.
the daughter said that some society in her school are selling roses & chocs for this special day. she was pretty surprised that it's selling like hot cakes. i guess when you are in that stage of puppy love ke crush ke, you'll swim the deepest ocean climb the highest mountain, mandi tak basah, tidur tak lena, makan tak kenyang or whatever it is the declaration of undying adulation is now. the sad part is really when one buys chocs tells it to the people doing delivery 'send this to me on valentine's day' just to give others the impression that she has a 'significant' other.
i mean when i was younger (back in the days) i did the entire works - gift, card, dinner with the boyfriend (the ex lah). when i got to know the hubby who is a little conservative & is not into pda, i still bought gifts & cards but i did it out of impulse. it didn't have to be a special occasion. once my ex-colleague mentioned that my hubby is indeed lucky 'cos i would go out for lunch cum shopping & come back with a little something for the hubby or the daughter and would kepoh-kepoh wanting to know what's the occasion. i'd tell him that i saw something that they might like so i decided to buy it & why does it have to take a special occasion to give them a gift. i'm sure everybody likes little surprises every now & then, no?
but i don't have anything against people who splurge on this day of lurve...wanna buy cheaper roses - try the schools lah, i think it goes for rm5 a pop. i think lah. and ladies, why bother with roses which you dump after like what 2 days, say no to chocolates or cupcakes which might only contribute to a muffin top but if you really must, go for patchi (heavenly)...go lah for something more substantial like jewellery ke, handbag ke, shoes ke, clothes ke. then when the guy gives you the break-the-bank-gift, you say lah with your most angelic face 'thank you thank you, sumpah 10 tahun i tak mintak apa-apa' but not to worry, 'cos by the time the next occasion that calls for a gift comes along, they'll forget what you said. betullll, men are forgetful like that. tried & tested.....
so people.....
image credit: www.photobucket.com
20090212
have i told you lately that i love you
i want to go see this grandpa rock zinjapour end of the month but the hubby is going to jakarta to cangkul rumput kat sana pulak..... :(
image credit: http://www.photobucket.com/
birthday shout out....silver surfer
hey there silver surfer, here's to you getting another year older...
image credit: www.photobucket.com
20090211
dear aunt agony
back when i was working & in the hr department, many people came to me for advise. when i was working for a tyrant of a boss, the people came to me cos i was the gentler monster. then when i move to my last employment they went to my bosses 'cos they preferred having their arse kissed. but for a regular dosage of falsampah, they came knocking on my door whenever i let them lah....and it always starts with 'eh, you free ah? can kacau ah?' always to the reply of 'what you want? go away...'. but they don't really go away. which part of go away with a scowl don't they understand??
but now that i have left the hr with a heart thing, it has not stopped friends or non-friends soliciting for advise. okay the thing is, you want to confide in me but do you have to add the keep this to yourself ah, this is private & confidential ah, this is between you and me ah. oh please who the fuck am i gonna tell? so today i am playing aunt agony & this morning alone i have dished out two advises whether relevant, helpful i really wouldn't know.
so i am all ears. gimme gimme gimme.... but today only ah.
but now that i have left the hr with a heart thing, it has not stopped friends or non-friends soliciting for advise. okay the thing is, you want to confide in me but do you have to add the keep this to yourself ah, this is private & confidential ah, this is between you and me ah. oh please who the fuck am i gonna tell? so today i am playing aunt agony & this morning alone i have dished out two advises whether relevant, helpful i really wouldn't know.
so i am all ears. gimme gimme gimme.... but today only ah.
it's not all about me
as i experiment with new looks for my 'dumping ground' for incessant ramblings & rants, whines, unsolicited advise; a thought occured - the 'me, myself & i' title did not seem somewhat appropriate. looking at it, i don't use my blog to camwhore, talk about how great i am & it's not all about me me me...
a friend mentioned that it's more like what i experience, my friends, the people i observe around me & life's little lessons that you might not get anywhere else. a couple of suggestions from her - colours of life or you, me & everyone else but i thought they sounded a bit to serious. i am humbled by the fact that it sometimes has given her the kick she needed or just the comfort that she is not alone after all. baby girl, thank you & know that i am always here for you even if we don't contribute plenty to telekom or celcom or maxis.
i suggested to another friend - a bitch's eye view (you know like bird's eye view) but she said i am an ocassional bitch. jap tanduk masuk jap tanduk keluar. i guess being unemployed has somehow made them horns blunt and in its place a halo is slowly taking form. yes? no? really!! i am mother theresa incarnate - cat has just confirmed this fact.
so it will remain the narcissistic me, myself & i till a more suitable one can be found. any suggestions people? the one who comes out a winner will get a date with me. okaylah, okaylah i chiak you lah....
a friend mentioned that it's more like what i experience, my friends, the people i observe around me & life's little lessons that you might not get anywhere else. a couple of suggestions from her - colours of life or you, me & everyone else but i thought they sounded a bit to serious. i am humbled by the fact that it sometimes has given her the kick she needed or just the comfort that she is not alone after all. baby girl, thank you & know that i am always here for you even if we don't contribute plenty to telekom or celcom or maxis.
i suggested to another friend - a bitch's eye view (you know like bird's eye view) but she said i am an ocassional bitch. jap tanduk masuk jap tanduk keluar. i guess being unemployed has somehow made them horns blunt and in its place a halo is slowly taking form. yes? no? really!! i am mother theresa incarnate - cat has just confirmed this fact.
so it will remain the narcissistic me, myself & i till a more suitable one can be found. any suggestions people? the one who comes out a winner will get a date with me. okaylah, okaylah i chiak you lah....
20090210
nonsensical sense
got this link (fuzzboks) from chindiana trails. have a look-see, it's pretty hilarious...
20090207
huffalumps, jackfruits & howling banshees
went on a girl's nite out with catwoman, her friend (zetty) & her friend's friend (tikus) to a lounge in a freakishly confusing place (two entrances with totally different names at two different streets that could only result in 'i'm in the lobby'; 'yeah so are we' - yeah you guessed it two different lobbies).
met up at klcc for dinner but since cat & i were early, we thought we'd grab coffee at aseana's. young cutie pie of a waiter was at our table & cat decided to hit on him. told her to give the poor lad a break & not be a cradle snatcher. but she said if i opened an eatery of my own & hired help like the cutie pie, she'd be at my place breakfast, lunch & dinner....cat, you want his number ah?
the friends arrived & we proceeded to chinoz for a late late dinner (as we were eating & sharing some very useful general knowledge, the other shops were closing for the day).
next stop - olive lounge. was a pretty cozy set up with a live band playing a mix of the 80s, 90s & current hits...not very crowded. a coupla guys in front of us, a group of chinese people, some mat-sallehs; all just knocking back a few drinks, smoking & enjoying the music. the chinese group left, then the mat sallehs left. in came another group headed by some datuk (cos i heard the singer addressing him as that) & his posse was several guys in ill-fitting ralph lauren polo tees. and what's a posse with girls girls girls.
i try not to be discriminating or prejudiced but these girls were something else. one was in a songket dress gone wrong (well it was kinda dark & the spots did long songkety), one in a very short mini skirt that i guess just covered her arse & another in an dress just not right for her. all was well until they decided to get their groove on. want to dance, go to the dance floor (er wait.. is there one?) & do it properly lah. but no there they were in the corner getting jiggy with it with strange moves that i thought were extinct. cat took a glimpse & asked 'what are they doing?' & i told her 'trying to dance' which they really look like they were doing.
short skirt girl was like a turkey doing the swan lake - gracefully or otherwise, 'flying' (??) from one end to the other hand gestures & all. jackfruit (another question from cat 'how does a size 12 fit into a size 2?') i think was trying the beyonce move booty and all; and and and she even tried her hand at singing. she's not such a bad singer really but tikus & i had the same thoughts at the same exact moment - if you don't look at the face but just listen, it's not that bad really. there she was singing endless love & it looked like she was in excruciating pain (really!!) with her face all cringed up as she tried very hard to sound like diana ross. i guess its what happens when one kemuts too long.
to top it off, we had a one guy with two girls group just behind us who were squealing away like the kuntilanak in a gone wrong hantu movie. but all in all the four of us had fun laughing at their expenses nevertheless (hey put four women together. they don't get any bitchier than this), singing along, enjoying the music & just being us. we even invented a new 'lighter' appreciation for the performing band. haiya, you know how the concert goers will light ignite their lighters and sway to the song they like or something like that but ours no lighter lah, we use fingers lah.
pity the band didn't sing some dangdut song otherwise we would have probably died laughing from the girls doing the gerudi. cat wanted to request a song 'nangka balut sarung' or something like that but all that we got out of a drummer (whom zetty knew) was a blank expression that went 'huh??'
till next time then....
met up at klcc for dinner but since cat & i were early, we thought we'd grab coffee at aseana's. young cutie pie of a waiter was at our table & cat decided to hit on him. told her to give the poor lad a break & not be a cradle snatcher. but she said if i opened an eatery of my own & hired help like the cutie pie, she'd be at my place breakfast, lunch & dinner....cat, you want his number ah?
the friends arrived & we proceeded to chinoz for a late late dinner (as we were eating & sharing some very useful general knowledge, the other shops were closing for the day).
next stop - olive lounge. was a pretty cozy set up with a live band playing a mix of the 80s, 90s & current hits...not very crowded. a coupla guys in front of us, a group of chinese people, some mat-sallehs; all just knocking back a few drinks, smoking & enjoying the music. the chinese group left, then the mat sallehs left. in came another group headed by some datuk (cos i heard the singer addressing him as that) & his posse was several guys in ill-fitting ralph lauren polo tees. and what's a posse with girls girls girls.
i try not to be discriminating or prejudiced but these girls were something else. one was in a songket dress gone wrong (well it was kinda dark & the spots did long songkety), one in a very short mini skirt that i guess just covered her arse & another in an dress just not right for her. all was well until they decided to get their groove on. want to dance, go to the dance floor (er wait.. is there one?) & do it properly lah. but no there they were in the corner getting jiggy with it with strange moves that i thought were extinct. cat took a glimpse & asked 'what are they doing?' & i told her 'trying to dance' which they really look like they were doing.
short skirt girl was like a turkey doing the swan lake - gracefully or otherwise, 'flying' (??) from one end to the other hand gestures & all. jackfruit (another question from cat 'how does a size 12 fit into a size 2?') i think was trying the beyonce move booty and all; and and and she even tried her hand at singing. she's not such a bad singer really but tikus & i had the same thoughts at the same exact moment - if you don't look at the face but just listen, it's not that bad really. there she was singing endless love & it looked like she was in excruciating pain (really!!) with her face all cringed up as she tried very hard to sound like diana ross. i guess its what happens when one kemuts too long.
to top it off, we had a one guy with two girls group just behind us who were squealing away like the kuntilanak in a gone wrong hantu movie. but all in all the four of us had fun laughing at their expenses nevertheless (hey put four women together. they don't get any bitchier than this), singing along, enjoying the music & just being us. we even invented a new 'lighter' appreciation for the performing band. haiya, you know how the concert goers will light ignite their lighters and sway to the song they like or something like that but ours no lighter lah, we use fingers lah.
pity the band didn't sing some dangdut song otherwise we would have probably died laughing from the girls doing the gerudi. cat wanted to request a song 'nangka balut sarung' or something like that but all that we got out of a drummer (whom zetty knew) was a blank expression that went 'huh??'
till next time then....
20090205
hit 'em up with style
when the hubby & i were an item, i got plenty unsolicited advise about how i shouldn't marry a malay because they can kawin empat tau...and my reply to them would be 'and your point is?' needless to say, i didn't listen to them. just for the cheek of it, sometimes hubby mentions about how it would be if i had 'friends' to keep me company. once when the daughter was much younger he asked her if he can have a girlfriend. her answer - ask mama lah. guess the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree.
during our recent trip to langkawi, we were talking to a friend whose other half works in another state & tries to make it home on the weekends. see, the guy was confiding in my significant other that he feels lonely & wishes the mrs would just move there to be with him. but the mrs is a bit reluctant as she prefers living in kl (more distractions i suppose). so my dear hubby asked her if she didn't mind if her hubby found solace / comfort in another woman's arms. her reply? simple - can, i'll allow it if he really wants to but but but.... he has to fulfill certains terms & conditions. takkan bini muda pakai prada, aku tak. aku pun nak prada jugak. lepas tu, dia tak balik pun takpe. aku siap pinangkan untuk dia.
of course the t&c included in property (bungalow ah, tolong sikit), kereta (kancil ke, perdana ke tak main), money in the bank (at least pun seven digit) & a monthly allowance (this one lesser, five digit cukup). we laughed about it of course, but i know she is not joking.
yonks ago, i told my hubby the same thing - i have to be well provided for before i allow him to 'diversify' but i am a bit more practical lah - don't need bungalow lah (silap hari bulan he buy one in balakong how?); a super-condo in kiara ke, klcc vicinity ke okaylah; kereta also don't need big big one lah, mini cooper s pun i tak kisah; money in the bank & a monthly allowance for the daughter & me and of course the open clause of 'ad hoc requests will be added from time to time' (i learnt this in hr. you go and see your jd, got or not this clause. if don't have, your hr tak bagus). lepas tu, buat tiga sekali gus tak yah pening pening. i siap tolong pinangkan & sarungkan cincin lagi.
this morning while driving, i heard on the radio blu cantrell's 'hit 'em up' (go cari on youtube ke, google ke lah, don't ask me la). i was singing along & suddenly the conversation above came to mind. see, i have been thinking of cancelling a credit card that the hubby has which i hold a supplementary to. hmm, maybe i won't cancel it just yet. remember? ad hoc? time to time?
during our recent trip to langkawi, we were talking to a friend whose other half works in another state & tries to make it home on the weekends. see, the guy was confiding in my significant other that he feels lonely & wishes the mrs would just move there to be with him. but the mrs is a bit reluctant as she prefers living in kl (more distractions i suppose). so my dear hubby asked her if she didn't mind if her hubby found solace / comfort in another woman's arms. her reply? simple - can, i'll allow it if he really wants to but but but.... he has to fulfill certains terms & conditions. takkan bini muda pakai prada, aku tak. aku pun nak prada jugak. lepas tu, dia tak balik pun takpe. aku siap pinangkan untuk dia.
of course the t&c included in property (bungalow ah, tolong sikit), kereta (kancil ke, perdana ke tak main), money in the bank (at least pun seven digit) & a monthly allowance (this one lesser, five digit cukup). we laughed about it of course, but i know she is not joking.
yonks ago, i told my hubby the same thing - i have to be well provided for before i allow him to 'diversify' but i am a bit more practical lah - don't need bungalow lah (silap hari bulan he buy one in balakong how?); a super-condo in kiara ke, klcc vicinity ke okaylah; kereta also don't need big big one lah, mini cooper s pun i tak kisah; money in the bank & a monthly allowance for the daughter & me and of course the open clause of 'ad hoc requests will be added from time to time' (i learnt this in hr. you go and see your jd, got or not this clause. if don't have, your hr tak bagus). lepas tu, buat tiga sekali gus tak yah pening pening. i siap tolong pinangkan & sarungkan cincin lagi.
this morning while driving, i heard on the radio blu cantrell's 'hit 'em up' (go cari on youtube ke, google ke lah, don't ask me la). i was singing along & suddenly the conversation above came to mind. see, i have been thinking of cancelling a credit card that the hubby has which i hold a supplementary to. hmm, maybe i won't cancel it just yet. remember? ad hoc? time to time?
20090204
to give & to receive; to receive & to give...
ye olde tradition that many look forward to when festivities come around especially by the kids are when theyget the packets filled with $$$. as far as i could remember (which can strecth by an inch & a mile) it was only during chinese new year that the 'hong pao' or red packet was given out to kids & singletons. along the way, as we evolved & assimilated into another's culture and became more muhibbah; soon there were 'duit raya' or green packets and also 'duit deepavali' (can we call it that).
i don't know what the trend is among the hindus who give out the money packs but i guess among the malays during raya, the green packets are given to children & young adults generally if you are still studying and haven't begun drawing a pay-check. depending on one's generosity, if you have just graduated & unemployed you may still be lucky enough to be on the receiving end. but the minute you start working & drawing a steady pay-check, that's it - all rights to receive monetary benefits stop. and for this money dispensing machine, amount given depends on which level of education you are pursuing. the higher the level, the more the moolah. to them nephew/s & nieces or the daughter for that matter reading this, if you so decide to start working, top midway to do your masters or phd - don't even think of it.
however, in the chinese tradition - once you get married you have to be the giver. for as long as you are single, you will still benefit at the receiving end. i mean if you are a kid or a teen, its fun & okay, if you are in your twenties & thirties, i guess it's still alright. but what i am curious about is - if you are a forty plus spinster or bachelor; what does it feel like receiving the hong pao? i mean i have come across many a women (no men so far) who are into their late forties and fifties & they still get hong pao. and these women i must say are financially independent & could very well afford to give very very hong pao...
how ah?
i don't know what the trend is among the hindus who give out the money packs but i guess among the malays during raya, the green packets are given to children & young adults generally if you are still studying and haven't begun drawing a pay-check. depending on one's generosity, if you have just graduated & unemployed you may still be lucky enough to be on the receiving end. but the minute you start working & drawing a steady pay-check, that's it - all rights to receive monetary benefits stop. and for this money dispensing machine, amount given depends on which level of education you are pursuing. the higher the level, the more the moolah. to them nephew/s & nieces or the daughter for that matter reading this, if you so decide to start working, top midway to do your masters or phd - don't even think of it.
however, in the chinese tradition - once you get married you have to be the giver. for as long as you are single, you will still benefit at the receiving end. i mean if you are a kid or a teen, its fun & okay, if you are in your twenties & thirties, i guess it's still alright. but what i am curious about is - if you are a forty plus spinster or bachelor; what does it feel like receiving the hong pao? i mean i have come across many a women (no men so far) who are into their late forties and fifties & they still get hong pao. and these women i must say are financially independent & could very well afford to give very very hong pao...
how ah?
20090201
i would if i could but i can't, so how?
hubby got into a little confusion & got the dates for an important wedding reception mixed up. see, the reception was supposed to be on friday night but he got it mistaken for saturday night. i didn't bother looking at the invites, trusting him instead. and i guess he was pretty sure that his friends would remind him to show up.
so friday night, we went out for a night in town with friends. the irony of it is, friday night we actually drove by the area of the venue so that we would get lost the next day. it was pretty late so i guess the reception was over by then. we got back in the wee hours of the next morning, so didn't bother checking the phones.
on the way to breakfast, he got a message on his phone 'tak nampak pun ko semalam'. and he went 'oh shit!! the reception semalam ke hari ni?' errrrr...... he was pretty worked up for having missed such an important event cos the father of the bride is some hot-shot business associate lah. and he asked me how come i was not too bothered about it. what can i say?
the thing is we did actually go to their smaller scale reception the week before & we did give them the gift already. i suppose going for one is better than missing both... so simply because of this, the hubby pulled a jekyll & hyde on me for one whole day. like i can do something about it...
so friday night, we went out for a night in town with friends. the irony of it is, friday night we actually drove by the area of the venue so that we would get lost the next day. it was pretty late so i guess the reception was over by then. we got back in the wee hours of the next morning, so didn't bother checking the phones.
on the way to breakfast, he got a message on his phone 'tak nampak pun ko semalam'. and he went 'oh shit!! the reception semalam ke hari ni?' errrrr...... he was pretty worked up for having missed such an important event cos the father of the bride is some hot-shot business associate lah. and he asked me how come i was not too bothered about it. what can i say?
the thing is we did actually go to their smaller scale reception the week before & we did give them the gift already. i suppose going for one is better than missing both... so simply because of this, the hubby pulled a jekyll & hyde on me for one whole day. like i can do something about it...
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