20080826

men are just.....

received this via email the other day from a friend - MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE..

nicknames
  • if laura, kate & sarah go out to lunch, they will call each other laura, kate & sarah.
  • if mike, dave & john go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as fat boy, godzilla or four eyes.
and if the men can't for the life of them remember the names or its simply too long, just call them brader or dude... works either way

eating out
  • when the girls get their bill, out comes the pocket calculators
  • when the bill arrives; mike, dave & john will each throw in $20 even though the bill is only $32.50. none of them will have anything smaller & none will actually admit they want change back.
money
  • a woman will pay $1 for a $2 item she doesn't need but it's on sale
  • a man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs

bathrooms

  • the average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 337. a man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
  • a man has seven items in his bathroom - toothbrush & toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, deodorant and a towel

arguments

  • a woman has the last word in any argument
  • anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument

future

  • a woman worries about the future until she gets a husband
  • a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife

success

  • a successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend
  • a successful woman is one who can find such a man

marriage

  • a woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't
  • a man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does

offspring

  • a woman knows all about her children. she knows about dentist appointments & romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears, hopes & dreams
  • a man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house

does that make men happier? women are from venus, men are just clueless...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

no they're NOT! they just want to be seen as happier ;)
sexist arent i? lol!

plain jane said...

not very difficult to keep them happy, what with them being simpletons. don't you think so??