bringing up kids

I think I've had one too many posts on kids. I am no genius & nor do I claim to be perfect when it comes to raising kids. But truth be told, it is indeed a challenge. Back then, when we were kids (yes it was that long ago) we wouldn't dare speak up or make a sound when we were being lectured till kingdom come by our moms. Now, you try and see...

So many things to teach them kids - about money, about sex, about life, about religion, about whats wrong and whats right. But how many parents can actually sit down with their kids and explain things to them? Or is it simply "Because I said so"? They go through phases you never knew existed.

Newborns, babies - its the 3hourly feed or more like 'Feed me now, I'm hungry' phase, weaning phase, potty training phase (this one takes a LOT of patience).

Toddlers / pre-teen - the terrible 2 (trust me they exist) phase, drawing on the wall phase, 'I want' phase, supermarket sweep phase.

Teenagers - 'I know' phase, 'I hate the world, the world hates me' phase, Emo, goth all the t-shirts in the wardrobe are black phase, 'Why don't everyone just drop dead' phase, 'I hate my life, I hate my parents' phase

Well, I have only reached the teenage stage so I shan't comment on the adolescent or young adult phase. It will come to that in a couple of years I suppose. But for now, I'll take it as it comes as I always do.

Then they eventually come out of whatever they were in, to pleasantly surprise you. They realize that the world is not out to get them after all. The black parade leaves town and the frown has turned upside down. And to get us through it all - lots of love, understanding, patience (loads and loads and loads and loads), prayer, faith, calm, belief...

I've seen parents who give in to their kids every whim and fancy. I've seen kids throwing tantrums just because they didn't get what they asked for. I've seen kids order and boss their parents around. Whether they behave like angels or brats, it is on the parents. There are parents who give in to their kids demands just to appease the guilt of spending too much time at work. See kids these days with the latest Mac or Blackberry (yes I saw a teenager with these gadgets) or zooming around in an Mini S.

Cliche as it may be, you know "when you love something, set it free" - well in a sense, it's something like that. You love them so much that you need to set them free. To experience, to feel, to learn. Painful it may be at times yes but no one has ever died from a little hard work yet or a fall while learning to ride the bike. Laughter there will be aplenty. Tears, there will be a generous amount too. These lessons will chart their course of life, to be the person whom they are meant to be.

And then, we'll sit back, beam & proudly say "that's MY kid".... or not. Our choice really....